Let Mr. Bigglesworth do his business, or kick him off the kitty litter

[Okay, back by popular demand, a post that I deleted because I was thinking it had no point and was too cutesy. But at the very least I got my first hate mail from it from some anonymous punk, grammatically-challenged thirteen year old: "wut kind of shit blog is this...IT SUX..just understand tht ur not a good blogger...."]

A week or two ago I saw an SUV with a custom license plate reading "ARFNMOW". Yes, a 50-something woman expressing with sheer onomatopoeic brilliance her love for mangy mutts and frisky felines.

Seeing as there's not enough controversy in this blog, it's time for me to take a stand. Stop pretending people that you can be a cat and dog person and like them equally! You have to take a side! Arf n' mow, ain't no how. Just who is man's best friend?

And I'm all for the dogs. I am for Benji, Lassie, and Marmaduke. Fido semper fidelis! Hey, I'm the first to cringe when an overzealous dog lover doesn't seem to account for where their dog's tongue has been before they let it get to what amounts to first base on their cheek. And there are certain aggressive breeds that belong in a zoo.

But I'm sorry, for all dogged-doggy faults, I'm convinced that most cats fit the clinical description of psychopath. The cold, calculating SOBs (although I guess strictly speaking, I could only call a dog a SOB). Yeah, okay, they're cute as a kitten as kittens, but that's just their MO to enslave humans.

Okay, well then, I just wouldn't want it be said that I missed the personal website cliche of discussing pets and other highly interesting themes.